


What Cats See

by Urbenmyth



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Attempted Animal Harm, Don't worry, Paranoia, the admiral is fine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:08:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27656618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Urbenmyth/pseuds/Urbenmyth
Summary: The Admiral is like many cats: running around, yelling at random, suddenly scared or angry for no reason.If only we could ask him why.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 32





	What Cats See

**Statement of The Admiral, regarding** **the three humans who lived in their house** **. Statement repeatedly given, but** **never** **understood.** ****

**Statement begins.**

I am happy with Human.

She provides me food and fuss, and she usually knows when to hug me and when to leave me be. She lets me sleep on the warm. She is kind, even if she is often away, and she smells slightly like dead things. Perhaps she hunts, when I am not around? Perhaps that is why she is away so often?

But I like Human.

It was just me and her, and then there was Second Human.

I was eating when Second Human came in.

I remember Second Human from a long time ago. He would come around often and pet me, when I was a child. He and First Human laughed, and talked, and then shouted, and then stopped talking, and then started talking again.

He left, and later, he came back, sometimes. He was rarely here for long.

He came in, and he had so many scars. The humans talked. He wept, a lot, and Human held him. He went upstairs.

Maybe he had been hurt? I didn’t know.

He didn’t leave.

It was scary, at first. Being around him felt different to before. He talked, a lot, and when he did I could feel predators, watching me, waiting to strike. Not him. But something around him.

But time passed, and he didn’t hurt me. Not did whatever was following him. And I risked a pet.

He stroked me. He still looked sad, but he looked happier. And he gave me food.

So I stayed around him. I decided I liked Second Human.

He stayed a long time and he knew when I wanted a hug and when I wanted to be alone. He always knew. He always knew what treats I liked. He always knew how to pet best.

I liked the Second Human, and Human seemed to like him. And all was happy.

But then there was Third Human. I did not like Third Human.

I remember the day I first saw them. Human was arguing with two Humans at the door. Second Human was out. I went to the living room, and I saw them crawl in through the window.

They were thin, very thin, and their skin was rough and dry. They were smiling, but it wasn’t a kind smile like Human’s or Second Human’s. I don’t think that Human asked them to come in. They looked at me and raised a finger to their lips, and I ran to get Human, who was closing the door on the people at the door.

She came in, but Third Human was gone. She petted me, and didn’t understand why I looked so afraid.

I have seen Third Human around a lot. They are hiding in cupboards and under the stairs and in rooms no-one’s in, and sometimes they pet me. Their skin is rough, and the way they pet is bad, so I yowl. And the humans come, and they are gone, and the humans wonder why I yelled.

They sit on the stairs when the Humans sleep, smiling at me. When one of them gets up, they move into the darkness, so the humans do not see them. I try to warn the humans, but they just pet me, and laugh about cats.

When the house goes dark, the humans swear and fiddle with a box, and do not see Third Human watching them. They cannot see in the dark, and Third Human is always gone when the light returns.

When they are out, Third Human walks the house, moving things, reading through books, and singing to themselves. They laugh. When the Humans return, they tell me off for knocking things off shelves.

I have tried to warn them about Third Human, but they do not understand. Second Human sometimes looks as if he might, but then he shakes his head, and pets me.

Human was out yesterday, and Second Human was upstairs talking. He talked a lot, and I didn’t go near him then. At first I’d tried to stop him, but it hadn’t worked. So I was downstairs and went in the living room, and Third Human was no longer hiding. They were sitting on the sofa. They looked at me, and they grinned, and made Psp Psp Psp noises. I hissed. I didn’t want to be petted by Third Human.

They stood up, and they grabbed me. They were not safe. I knew that. They held me and stroked me, and they sang in their strange voice. They said something about “fur”, which is normally a nice word Human and Second Human say, but the way _they_ said it made me very scared. I scratched at them, and bit.

The skin came off in a gash. What was underneath was not flesh, but hard white. Like the chairs Human sometimes brought out when Other Humans came round. 

Third Human laughed, and dropped me. They kept laughing as I ran outside.

I was outside for a long time.

When I came back, the house was dark, and Second Human was shaking with fear. He hugged me and cried.

I haven’t seen Third Human since then. And Second Human left, and didn’t come back.

So now I go back to sitting on the warm, and getting pets and treats. Life is good. Human is kind.

Sometimes she yells at me for running around the house. “What’s got into you?” she says.

I tell her I’m checking Third Human hasn’t come back. That they aren’t hiding anywhere.

But she doesn’t listen.

So I go back to checking. I love Human. And I have fought Third Human before.

I will make sure no-one grabs her, and holds her, and sings about fur.


End file.
